Sporadic road cone displays have always been a part of the package of visiting and travelling around the beautiful Coromandel Peninsula.
The breathtaking State Highway 25 and 25A take in both coastal shores and forest wonderlands, frequently peppered with segments of those delightful reflective beacons of joy – Road Cones.
Recently however, locals and visitors alike are lamenting the notable decrease in the shiny structures that keep our road workers and merry travellers safe on our coastal routes. It has been brought to our attention that this is due to significant issues with the supply of the 2022 design of road cone, a batch code-named ‘The Perky Orange’.
Tama Gibraltar, Head of Cone Placement of the Road Safety Team NZ, has stated,“Across Aotearoa we like to have at least 8 billion cones available to bring in for our various projects, but due to the expensive production of The Perky Orange, we have fallen short by 3.7%”.
This has meant that roads across New Zealand are missing approximately 29.6 million road cones, and the Coromandel Peninsula is feeling the pressure.
Cone placement groups from the Coromandel SH25 Cone Division and local teams under the Coromandel Council have been required to attend cone-based strategic meetings and conferences across Aotearoa in recent months. These meetings, held behind clearly signed and closed doors, were not open to the public although the agenda was provided upon request. This agenda outlined the plan to form a solid foundation of cone orientation that ultimately leads to a finite and satisfying peak. It went on to suggest that when this is achieved, multiple layers of success can be neatly stacked on top.
Standard guideline 16.B (II) of the Cone Placement Bill Aotearoa (1979) states that, ‘Glossy orange cones need to be placed at maximum 12 inches apart’. The guidelines later state that this achieves two important outcomes:
16.C (III) allow for scooters and small pedestrians to manoeuvre between them safely.
16.C (IV) allow for an attractive aesthetic that those queueing can enjoy for hours at a time.
The Perky Orange has not only brought down the ratio of road cones to citizens, now 1503 Road Cones/Each Citizen (2022 census), but it has brought up costs for the taxpayer. Pearl Mapex, CEO of The Lovely Cones Company, has informed us that the production of each batch of a thousand cones cost around $85k. This means that nationally the bill has amounted to over 340 billion dollars between 2016 to present.
Local road users have noticed this shift from the standard 12 inches between each road cone to that of the rather debilitating 14 inches. “The cost is not the issue,” says local resident Ayotte Evans.
“I am happy to foot the bill, as long as this poor excuse of a government gets their act together and increases production of the perky orange buggers.”
As if this wasn’t already enough to paint a blemish on our colourful commute, a recent report from the Coromandel Youth Trust was published in recent weeks. The report finds that the lack of access to road cones has meant that youths are struggling to source Perky Oranges to place atop lampposts, pine trees and chimneys. Youth leaders describe increased levels of lethargy and vacant stares beyond the horizon. Both time and therapy are only temporary solutions.
Will we ever see a return of the SH25 scenic drive featuring not only ice creams and beaches, but also our beloved orange runways? How can we ensure our roads are safe, if not for the stoic diurnal and nocturnal pillars of our community? Will the government step forward and lay out a roadmap for how to fix this problem, one Perky Orange at a time?
We have reached out for a comment from the Ministry of Vehicles and Roads, more to come …
Words by Rabian Foberts
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